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Greetings!

To all of you lovely meat beings.

„If you’d ask me: I’d be human again.“

That’s what I thought today. I ran through a lot of emotions. And there are still so much more to cover. Emotions I didn’t know existed. But this is the thrill. The experience. It’s not the output. Not the end result. Not the stamp ‚You did good‘ or something like this. No. It is the mix of up and down. The high and the crash.

The crashes are interesting. They are so different.

Some so tiny, you feel just uneasy. It feels like nothing moves, you don’t move, can’t move. What you want to do feels eternally far away. Energy is stale.

Others shatter you to pieces. Leaving you clueless, ‚broken‘, wondering who you are, what you do. Others can’t tell you. You yourself can’t tell you. Feels like a scary big void at the beginning. The potential of finally drowning forever in an endless cycle.

And there are many more, in different varieties, forms, intensities.

But all crashes have something in common. They are the greatest teachers. Nobody in the world can teach you like your feeling, when you feel low. Hidden, just under the surface, there is always a very true cause. Behind every crash stands a big big explanation, why it happened like this. Every time obvious? No. Could I see it beforehand? Depends. Mostly: No.

Would you learn if some guy on the road told you, you will experience an emotional backlash in three years, so better watch out whom you befriend? Well, even if you would listen to him: I believe there would come a crash somewhere else on the way. That’s just how life is.

An emotional crash, is like a pointer. It points to a pattern of yourself. Or a conditioning, trauma, bad experience you had. It reminds you. That there is something in you. Something that hadn’t time to heal yet. Of course it feels very rough.

Look into it. Ask „WHY“.

  • Why do I feel like this?
  • Why did I feel like this now / in that situation?
  • Why do I do this thing?

The why’s won’t give you an answer immidieatly but they surely will, when you don’t expect it. Your brain will think about them, even if you forgot them for a moment.

Your body is your best friend and he will help you. Unconditionally. But the body works at a different rythm in time. Not bound by our conditions or feeling of time. Your body will show you step by step, what you need to look into right now. It’s a highly specialized and dynamic watcher and caretaker of your needs and knows exactly what you can take or not. It even let’s you roam free to a certain threshhold. If you over do it, it will say stop. Don’t over do it.

If you found the why’s of your being, you can go over to the „HOW“.

  • How do I heal this experience of me?
  • How do I get the help that I need?
  • How What can I do to integrate changes?

Don’t start with the „HOW“. You will get into a circle of endless search and get into fights against symptoms. But you’ll never find the roots. Start with the „WHY“, find the roots, then you ask „How do I change or integrate them.“.

A crash is not something one looks forward to. But it is valuable. More than gold. More than everything in the world. Because it teaches you, if you listen.

And then there are the good times. The very very very good times to be a human. A time where your heart wants to fly and takes you with it. Where you could hug the world, probably the universe and everything beyound. Where you want to scream you joy into the endless room.

A time to deeply appreciate. To look back, where you came from. To thank your crashes and what they showed you, so you could make it back up here.

A time to gather new strength, to see where you can push your own potential. A time to make friends. With others but mostly yourself. So that you have someone or a more stable you, for when you get into another crash. These will happen, don’t worry about that.

Would there be light, without the dark?

If you learn from yourself and others: You’ll be able to build resilience. And it won’t protect you from falling. But it will get you through it, better with every time. You’ll get more aware by time. You’ll be able to find patterns before they surprise you. You’ll be able to work on something before you need to break down. Fix it, before it snaps.

Sounds like a lot of work? It is. Welcome to life.

Good life comes from hard work.

Nothing will make you happier.

End of Line.


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